As the title says, this post is about Autistic Spectrum Disorder aka Asperger’s Syndrome. Which term you use depends on where you’re from. Here in Canada, I’m told, it’s still called Asperger’s Syndrome. I’m just going to refer to it as ASD for convenience.
I haven’t been formally diagnosed, (just waiting for a referral), but I most likely have ASD. “Have” isn’t really the right word. This isn’t some disease I caught, it’s who I am and, for the most part, I like who I am. There are some negatives to ASD. Anxiety, depression and headaches are common, but those, in my opinion, have more to do with society as a whole being understandably geared toward the neurotypical (ie, people without ASD), than anything inherent to it.
Not all bad
A lot of things about me that I love are commonly attributed to ASD. The ability to learn on my own, being able to hyperfocus and “special interests.” That last
one is both a joy and a curse. There’s not much that feels better than putting all my thoughts and energy toward a topic I love, but I tend to switch interests at random intervals, making me a bit of a jack of all trades, master of none.
This switching seems to be a trait more commonly associated with women who have ASD than with the men who have it. Men are more likely to have one special interest that they focus on for a long time. This can lead to a good career, although sometimes the interest is a little out there, as I understand it. On the other hand, women tend to have more “normal” interests. (Is there really such a thing as normal?) In my case those interests are needlecraft (hence this blog), visual arts and storytelling (writing, reading, playing games with strong stories, etc). I can think of ways of making a living at all of those, but sticking to just one is extremely difficult.
It’s incredibly frustrating. Every interest is the one I’m “meant to do” while it’s my focus, but the focus keeps changing. Right now that focus is art. It’s not that I don’t still love crochet, I do, and it’s not that I can’t work on it at all, but I can’t hyperfocus on it, now. Doing more than routine work on it is like pulling teeth, at the moment.
Where I go from here
I’ll still be posting regularly on crochet topics (I’m planning a yarn review for next week) and working on new patterns. However, my enthusiasm just isn’t there at the moment. It’ll come back, though, it always does.
Sorry if I’m rambling a little more that usual, this time. I’m still trying to process this Autistic Spectrum Disorder stuff.